My Austrian Family

When I say I am visiting relatives in Austria, some look shocked and some ask if they're from Jana's side.  Nope.  They are my relatives, and they are Vietnamese (Chinese actually but let's not get into that story right now.)

During the great emigration wave of the late 1970's and early 1980's, my immediate family along with most of my extended family escaped Vietnam (generally by boat).  All of us landed in refugee camps, a kind of purgatory as we waited on paperwork and approvals to get us elsewhere.  The US being the top destination choice had the longest waits, making other countries willing to take us in more appealing.  Austria was one of those options, and my cousin took it.  (There's debate if he mistook Austria for Australia.  Who even has heard of Austria before Arnie became the Terminator.)  His initial plan was to make it to Austria, bring over the remaining family members still in Vietnam, and try to immigrate to the US where my family ended up settling.  However, one thing led to another, and they remained in Austria which means,  "I have relatives in Austria!"  

We went to visit them this past week.  It's been 10 years since my last visit, and I wanted them to meet Jana and Makai.  And both Jana and Makai loved them (Jana is hoping the feeling is mutual.)  From being local tour guides, to home cooked meals, to fighting over bills, these guys put southern hospitality to shame. 

Two moments stand out.  The first occurred when we departed Salzburg by train.  The entire Salzburg family came out to bid us farewell.  And as we entered the train and searched for seats, the entire family followed us from outside of the train, waving at Makai each time we looked out the window.  5 cars in, we found our seats and gave our final wave to my Salzburg family as the train pulled away.  The second moment occurred when we departed Vienna to return to Tel Aviv.  My cousin (first cousin-once removed) scheduled a car to pick us up at 6 AM.  She woke up along with us at 5 AM and prepared us coffee and packed us a little snack bag complete with freshly sliced mangos and sandwiches. I bragged to Jana, "That's my family."  Liking the whole experience, she responded, "That's my family now too."

Attention SF LG's: Our standards have been raised and we expect the same treatment in two weeks!

Here are a few family photos from the trip.  More photos can be found here.  Austria 2012 Photos

Cousins in Vienna.  Makai ran away from the group photo.

Cousins in Salzburg.  I look like a giant standing next to them.

Salzburg Cousins.

And I will end with this funny photo of Makai.  Yep that's my son.

Peeing in the Hohensalzburg Castle.

Hi-pot-ee-sees

Makai has been quite the chatter bug lately.   If you don't respond, he will repeat, repeat and repeat himself for a good 30 minutes.   When I drive I have to ask him to be quiet so I can concentrate.   That's how much he's talking.  Besides his imaginary characters, his latest interests are experiments and coming up with "hi-pot-ee-sees" aka, hypothesis.   The other day we were sitting on the couch and he went into his normal thinking daze.   Basically he is lost in thought.  I have to speak loudly and wave my hand in front of his face to get his attention.  "Maks!  Woo hoo!   I don't mean to interupt, what are you thinking?"

Makai:  I'm not maks, I'm Lola.  You're Charlie.  Lola thinking.
Me aka Charlie:   Lola what are you thinking?
Lola:   I am thinking of a hipoteesees
Charlie:  say hi - poth - e - sizzz.  Tell me about your hypothesis
Lola:  Charlie I'm still thinking.  Hmmmm... (as he grabs his chin)

The next day we were walking around and I said makkie, what kind of car should we buy when we move back to the states?  This one or this one?

Makai:  I am a triceratops and you're a stegosaurus
Stegosaurus: ok triceratop what do you think.
Triceratop:  triceratop wants an electric car
Stegosaurus:  we will be broke if that happened
Triceratop:  mommie stegosaurus, triceratop says no diesel, steam, or gasoline.   Triceratop wants an electric car.  Not this one.
Stegosaurus:  we'll your father wanted me to teach you how to save the world since he's killing it.  I guess this will work.  Why don't we go shopping for Electric Scooters.
Triceratop:  Electric scooter?  Wow.  hmmm... let me think.

Pooh, Lola, Buddy, Gerald, Piggie, etc..

For about 6 months now Makai is always imagining himself to be a character from a book to a character on TV.  All of us around him are given our "assigned" characters and play along, even Pali and Sabbia.

His favorites:

-- Tom (from tom and Jerry):  Today he decided to play Tom in the afternoon.  I was in the kitchen and heard him "meowing".  I found him on the dining room table walking like a cat on all four legs.  He even pretended to lick his paw.   "Tom not the table.  Go to Jerry's house and climb the bed.  You can jump there."  He then climbed down and made his way to "Jerry's house" aka Mom and Dad's room on all 4's meowing.

-- Lola (From Charlie and Lola):  He reenacts different parts of the books.  Mostly pink milk, hopping into bed or hopping in general, and Lola's dress up characters, alligators, butterflies, ballerinas, bees.  I'm always Charlie. Pali is always Sizzles.

-- Winnie the Pooh:  I'm Christopher Robins, Scott's Tigger, Maks is either piglet or pooh, Pali's Eyore and Sabbia is Owl.  We usually go searching for a bee hive or a pot of honey.  Sometimes we even get a "balloon" to make the day more fun.  He sits on the balloon when he's piglet. One day we were at the playground, he jumped off the merry go round and ran to the ladder for the slide.  While running he said "The bees are coming the bees are coming!  Hurwee Christopher Robins! Hurwee! Let's go to Poohs tree house!"  He climbs the ladder as fast he can (which for him was surprisingly fast for him) hops up to the top and pretends to close all the windows and doors.  There were a three kids at the top looking at him.  He offered them his pot of honey (his hand) and they all looked at him and went down the slide.   A week later we met some American's with a 3 year old daughter a week older than Makai.  Odeah understood what he was playing and they played this game for 4 hours.

Another day we were at the playground and there was a little girl playing by herself.  I asked him if he wanted to play with her.  He said no I want to play with Christopher Robins.  I said "that little girl is Kanga, see how she is jumping all over the slide?"  He then ran up to her starting shouting Kanga Kanga!  I'm coming! They played.  Mission accomplished.  Her name was Kanga the whole time.  I don't think the little girl understood why she was being called Kanga for an hour.

Today he was the conductor from the PBS show dinosaur train.  All the kids climbed to the top of the slide.  He kept yelling ALL ABOARD!  ALL ABOARD THE DINOSAUR TRAIN".  Each time a kid wanted to go down the slide he would ask for a ticket.  Not one kid gave him a ticket.  He didn't care.  He pretended he had claws to punch a hole through the invisible ticket.  When they started going down the slide he would yell "TIME TUNNEL TIME TUNNEL!"   Majority of the kids never went back on the dinosaur train.   Poor kid.  That didn't stop him from make believing! 

His Israeli friends which he does have here play different make believe games.   Maks and I meet up with them after their kindergarten lets out and he goes into his whole imaginary game.  He's Mickey Mouse and everyone else has their own character.  He starts it off.  While he's asking them to chase Mickey and play soccer/futbol, they offer him "fake beer" and show him how to "roll cigarettes" using rolling paper and "smoke" them.  He says "no thank you."   I told Scott I was happy I didn't have to have a peer pressure talk at the age of 3 with the boy! 

Oh and when you read a book to him, he will correct you if you don't substitute the main characters name for Makai.   "No Mommie, that's not Trixie, that's Makai."   "Makai goes to visit Oma in Boise."  "No mommie that's not Oma, that's Woodstock".  "Makai goes visit Woodstock in Boise.  Boise is very far away..."

Heading to the beach as a sea otter.
He wants to swim like a sea otter.

"Kanga" (Israeli girl) and "Piglet" (Maks) at the playground

Sizzles (Pali) and with her triceratop collar.  

Oscar being grouchy.

Kenny!

An old post I forgot to publish!

Jana the Brave.

Hilarious email from Jana to me describing her trip with Makai to the only bike store in Tel Aviv with a padded bike seat for Makai's new balance bike.

By the way for context, Florentine is an industrial neighborhood of Tel Aviv.  We live in Neve Tzedek, a historical and yuppy-ish neighborhood next to Florentine.

Anyways, the things moms do for their kids.  Enjoy.

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Jana Leon Guerrero <scottiewinsjana@gmail.com>
Date: Wed, Sep 12, 2012 at 4:51 PM
Subject:
To: scott nguyen <pacolee@gmail.com>

we had an interesting time picking up the seat from florentine.  it was 40nis.  anyways, so i call and he said go to kfar giladi and its at the corner of derek jaffo above a moroccan store.  go inside to floor 3.  so we bike over there.  i get there and it smells like urine. nasty.  i walk into the door which leads to a run down hallway.  there are men, pissing with their penis's hanging out.  they all look drunk.  this apt/store complex looked like something you would find in malaysia at a slum.  makai says mommie, carry me please.  so i carry him, his helmet, his new puzzles, his new train transformer, his pillow, and my bag.   i went to floor 3 not thinking that it is really floor 4 in america and its a bathroom where once again, people are pissing and high as ever, needles on the floor.  so i walk out as quickly, trying not to look freaked out.   i really wanted to take photos but couldn't.  maks had a good hold of me.

so i get downstairs and  i call him back.  he says oh yes i am here and this guy from the moroccan store comes out and says oh you're looking for the bike shop?  yes.  let me take you i own it.  its my son's shop. he says go to the top floor.  i said i was at the bathroom, he goes oh no, not there.  that's no good.  people are on drugs there. top floor.  i was like, "fine, not one other place has the seat." everyone ignored us and i kept my sunglasses on.   i get up stairs and there are a bunch of 20 year olds smoking weed in a bike/skate shop.  i look around and i think oh great.  makai gets down and says "hi"...  jumps up and down and says "my shoes light up! see see!  my shoes light up!"  one guy says WOW that's Rad!  i am thinking ok these guys seem completely harmless and this is something cool to show those who are high.  so they ask where i am from and how long i am here and where i live.  i said i live in florentine. been here for 2 years.  they then wanted us to go to the skate park with them.  they were on there way after they finished their beers. the son of the guy who owned the place started yelling at them and one guy laughed and said oh, we are not suppose to act like this so we need to clean up our beers for customers.  i said no worries, we came for a balance bike seat so we won't be long.  they then opened a map and told me how to get to the skate park and hoped to see us there.  they can teach makai some tricks.  

as we get back down to the first floor there are more people pissing and dicks hanging out.  i swear it was something out of a movie.

The RF Police

About two months ago at around 8 or 9 at night, there was a knock on our door.  A man stood at our door but did not speak any English.  After a moment of awkwardness, he called someone that did speak English.  The caller claimed that there was something from our apartment interfering with Orange's (our local wireless carrier) cellular service.  They wanted to come in and check for the source of the interference. 

Being a skeptical American, I balked.  They had no identification, and it was late at night. I questioned how they could identify that the source of the interference was coming from our apartment, especially since we've been living here for over 1 year without previous interference issues.  The night ended with them retreating and agreeing to send the radio technician that made the claim in the first place.

Two months passed.  Then we received a letter in the mail from the Ministry of Communications or something like that saying we had an illegal radio source that is interring with Orange's broadband spectrum and that it is a prison-able offense.  After calling them and leaving a message, two weeks later someone finally called back, and we scheduled a technician to visit the apartment.  Turns out Orange has recently started using their 900 MHz spectrum which is coincidentally the same frequency that the baby monitor uses.  So we had to say goodbye to the monitor else poor little Makky goes to jail.

Electric Scooter

One of Makai's favorite songs is "Electric Car" by They Might be Giants.  Not sure why since all his toys are essentially funded by the oil industry. 

Anyways, to placate the little guy and his tree-hugging ways, we purchased an electric scooter.  Jana and Makai have now expanded their frolicking radius to something like 5 km, enough to get to the Dizengoff Mall where there is a kiddy bathroom complete with an elephant trunk and playground. Makai and Jana have such a tough life...

Electric scooter complete with toddler seat

The kiddie bathroom at the mall

Passed out.  Locals thought i was suffocating

And here's the problem with electric vehicles.  On my first trip with the scooter with Makai, the thing ran out of batteries half-way home.  Had to walk the scooter and Mak about 1 mile home.  Jana offered to come pick us up with the car, but I declined.  At least the walk was along the beach promenade. 

Security Message for U.S. Citizens

I received 5 "Security Messages for U.S. Citizens" today.  The US embassy recommended I avoid going to Amman, Jordan, The West Bank, and The Old City in Jerusalem.  Well that screws up my weekend plans. 

Here's an example of one of the security messages.  I've highlighted in bold an amusing "politically correct" phrase.

--------------

For your information, U.S. Embassy Tel Aviv would like to retransmit the below Security Message for U.S. Citizens issued by U.S. Consulate General Jerusalem on September 13, 2012. 

Security Message for U.S. Citizens: Possible Demonstrations in the Old City

The U.S. Consulate General in Jerusalem advises U.S. citizens that due to the possibility of demonstrations on Friday, September 14, the Old City of Jerusalem is off-limits to U.S. Government personnel that day.  U.S. citizens are advised to defer non-essential travel to the Old City and to generally exercise an extra measure of caution.

We remind U.S. citizens that due to the possibility of demonstrations throughout the West Bank, the U.S. Consulate General has limited both official and personal travel in the West Bank until further notice.  U.S. citizens are advised to defer non-essential travel to, and within, the West Bank and to exercise an extra measure of caution.

We also take this opportunity to remind U.S. citizens that demonstrations, even peaceful ones, can turn violent with little or no warning.  U.S. citizens should be aware of their surroundings at all times, and avoid large crowds.

For the latest security information, U.S. citizens traveling abroad should regularly monitor the Department of State&#8217;s Internet website where the Worldwide Caution,  Country Specific Information for Israel, the West Bank and Gaza, Travel Warnings, and Travel Alerts can be found, including the current Travel Warning for Israel, the West Bank and Gaza.  You can also follow the Bureau of Consular Affairs on Twitter and on Facebook.  Up-to-date information on security can also be obtained by calling 1-888-407-4747 toll-free in the United States and Canada, or, for callers outside of the United States and Canada, on a regular toll-line at 1-202-501-4444.  These numbers are available from 8:00 a.m. to 8:00 p.m. Eastern Time, Monday through Friday (except U.S. federal holidays).

U.S. citizens are advised to maintain valid travel documents and enroll with the Department of State or the U.S. Consulate General in Jerusalem through the State Department Smart Traveler Enrollment Program website, https://travelregistration.state.gov.  For further information, U.S. citizens may telephone the Consulate General in Jerusalem at (972) (2) 630-4000 or the Embassy in Tel Aviv at (972) (3) 519-7575 during working hours. After hours (for emergencies), U.S. citizens may telephone either the Consulate General at: (972) (2) 622-7250, or the Embassy in Tel Aviv at: (972) (3) 519-7551. Up-to-date information on security conditions can also be accessed at http://usembassy-israel.org.il or http://jerusalem.usconsulate.gov.

For your information, below we are also retransmitting an emergency message for U.S. citizens issued by the U.S. Embassy in Amman, Jordan on September 12, 2012.